I've recently started work as a manager at a store in a popular tourist location in New Jersey. A couple of days ago, a woman came into the store looking for something that we did not sell. Having spent a lot of time here over the course of my life, I had a pretty good idea of where she might go to get it. I stopped what I was doing to tell her about the store that I believed carried what she was looking for, and gave her directions to get there. And then I continued to go about my day. A little while later, the woman came back to the store. She had found what she was looking for just where I'd sent her and wanted to say thank you.

If there was one person like that for every person I've had bitch me out for something completely beyond my control, my work days would be far more pleasant. Unfortunately, I see a lot more complaining. "Why don't you carry this?" "Why is this so expensive?" "Why is my food taking so long?" "Why don't you have more registers open?" "What do you mean I have to pay to get in?" "Why do I have to get out of the water?" "Why don't you know the answer to my question?" "Why weren't you here five minutes ago?"

I've had a lot of different jobs in my life, in a wide variety of fields. I've been working since 2005, and in all those years, I have always been working at least one job in some sort of position with night and weekend hours, as opposed to the normal 9 to 5 grind. These positions have seen me stationed in a variety of tourist attractions, retail locations, and go-to places for an evening out. They require me to work the hours that most people are spending with their loved ones, like weekends, and holidays. I have missed Thanksgiving, and Easter, and Christmas Eve dinners. I'm given no paid time off, but I stand at my post and work all these times that you don't want to so that you get to enjoy YOUR vacation. And you know what? There are so, so many people like me. A lot of them are doing far more important jobs than I am - soldiers, doctors, firefighters - and a lot of them are the service people that you take for granted.

I've gotten up at 3am on Thanksgiving morning to help dress parade marchers so that you can watch them on TV. I don't claim to be as important as the firefighter who had to save your home after you tried to deep fry a turkey, but I matter. I've sat outside in heat advisories for full 8 hour days to ensure that beach tags were being sold so that the city could afford to maintain the beaches that you are enjoying. I don't claim to be as important as the lifeguard who dove in to save your child when the riptide pulled her out into deep water, but I matter. I've worked countless cash registers on evenings and weekends, at a tourist attraction, so you could get your souvenir T-shirt, at a clothing store, so you could replace the shoe you broke, at a general store, so you could get that aspirin you need for your aching head. I don't claim to be as important as the police officers patrolling the streets to make sure you get home safely after you've made your purchase, but I matter. Think for a moment about all the people who make your life easier just by showing up for work and doing their jobs. Now ask yourself when the last time you thanked one of them was.

Fourth of July is this week, and many of you will be enjoying barbecues, and days at the beach, and nights of beer and fireworks. And amidst your revelry, there will be those of us who are waiting at our posts. Waiting for you to forget your sunscreen, so that we can sell you a fresh bottle. Waiting for you to leave your hotel room, so that we can clean it for you. Waiting for you to need a cold beer, so that we can pour it for you. Waiting for you to blow your fingers off with a firecracker, so that we can sew them back on.

If you've gotten this far into the entry and thing I'm incredibly self-centered and asking for recognition for myself, let me repeat: There are so, so many people like me. And honestly? Most of them would appreciate it if you were just not a total dick to us. And I'm not saying that you are. I know a lot of great people read my blog - a lot of people who have worked some sort of service position, and know that a little politeness goes a long way. But a lot of people take for granted the fact that, in order for them to enjoy their vacation, or their weekend, or their night on the town, there are a whole bunch of people who are at work, sacrificing their own weekend. And the value of just saying "Thank You" is a lot more than you might think.

~Jessica

I highly recommend full-screen

~Jessica

So it's nearly 3 in the morning, and I'm awake. I'm awake because I'm planning an adventure. In the literal actually-making-reservations sense of the word, I started planning this adventure when I bought a plane ticket about two and a half months ago. In the less tangible sense of the word, I've been planning this adventure for over ten years.

I spoke in a previous entry about how I've started to keep things to myself a lot more than I used to, and one of the biggest examples of this is the adventure that I'm planning and booking and pulling my hair out over. I haven't told many people, and the people I have told have pretty much reassured me that I'm making the right decision in keeping my mouth shut. I obviously had to tell my parents, and my boyfriend. They're obviously being supportive, though if I make mention of being stressed out over the planning, they give me an eye roll accompanied by some version of "You should just be appreciating the fact that you are able to do this", and they always have something to say about how I should or shouldn't do things. I also selected a few close friends to be informed of my intentions. Those friends have been entirely supportive, and I'm glad that I told them.

The people who most made me want to keep my mouth shut, however, are the acquaintances I've mentioned it to in passing. People down in DC kept asking what I was doing after the show closed, and where I'd be working, so after a lot of "I don't knows", I finally admitted what I would be doing. The responses were varied, but a lot of the comments made me uncomfortable, ranging from people asking how I could possibly afford it (I've been saving for the entire 8 years I've been in the workforce) to asking why I was going, to making simple-minded presumptions about why I was going.

It was in those moments that I realized why some things are better when kept to yourself. This is my trip, and I've already asked for advice from the people whose advice I was interested in hearing. Namely the two people who have done it before. I don't care what anyone else has to say about it, I really just don't. And maybe that's closed-minded of me, but it's true. I also am sick of trying to explain it to other people.

Sometimes, I can't decided if I am rude for not asking more questions about people's lives in conversations, or if they're the rude ones for continuing to pry into mine. For the past few months, I was living and working in DC in a theatre, and on my one day off a week, I was returning to New York to work a shift at my part time job to maintain that position, which offers me health insurance. And every single person in my life insisted that I explain that to them, and then proceeded to make unsolicited comments about it. It's really quite simple: I was offered a temporary job out of town doing something I love to do. I have a part time job that provides me with health insurance. In order to take the out of town job but still receive health insurance, I had to work shifts at both jobs. I arranged my schedule in a way that allowed me to do that. And frankly, if you're not me, or one of my employers, how I do that really isn't your concern.

It's a similar feeling now. And I suppose the fact is that, in this day and age, we present so much of our lives to the people around us through the internet by way of blogs and Facebook, and Twitter, and FourSquare, and the like, it's now almost expected for someone to comment on everything you do. You don't say things just to say them, you say them to receive feedback. But I'm sick of anxiously awaiting people's feedback on my every move. So I'm not saying anything to anyone else until the moment before I shut my phone off and board the plane.

I know that I just sound like a whiny, angsty, teenager right now bitching about how people won't just leave me alone and let me do my thing. And I understand that some of the comments aren't meant to be condescending or nosy, they just come off that way. I also understand that some people are just trying to help, and I really am thankful for the support of the family and friends who have helped me to make the last few months and the upcoming ones possible. I do appreciate the help they have been giving me. And I also know that once my plane lands, I won't give two shits about what anyone thinks about where I am, because I'll be totally ecstatic. And probably in tears.

~Jessica